I no longer worry about

being happy

happiness is no longer a goal

I pursue or thing

I wish to attain

for it is transient and fleeting

and often too superficial for my brain

let alone my soul

to drink of

now instead, I seek meaning

that which fills me up

from the depths inside

which gives my sole existence purpose

this pursuit and drive for meaning

for the depths of life

no matter how raw or painful

or how searingly honest

or heartbreakingly poor I become

my soul craves meaning above all else

not the frip-frap of that elusive ‘happy’

no things, people, objects can ever make me happy

only understanding and more

the mystery of life itself

like the constant back and forth

of the ocean lapping the shore.

Angela Dunning, 4th June 2019

Photo by Blaque X from Pexels


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