Living by time is like trying to wring every last drop of water out of a soaking wet cloth, gripped tightly between our hardened hands, desperately trying to control life itself, as if that were ever possible.
To live your life by each minute, each segment of allotted time for you, your work, your kids, etc, etc… is to not live life at all. But, rather to play a loosing game of manipulation. A fruitless, futile deception of the worst kind. As ultimately, life will always win out and you will always loose in the end.
To try to wring each second of your precious life out of that ragged, worn-out old cloth is to try to forever run. Away from your true self, your true feelings, your true needs. It is to forever never be present with those you love, those who need you and those moments you really want to cherish the most.
Time itself is but an illusion. Therefore, that game you play is nothing less than that same illusion. A fantasy of the saddest proportions. I always feel desperately sad when people describe to me their time-allotted lives, living purely by the mechanics of a ticking machine on a shelf or their screen, each moment ticking away, ticking away…
For to take your eyes of that machine is nothing less than to liberate your soul. To gain the freedom you long for and to find a life truly worth living. Worth seeing and worth feeling, in every moment.
The hands of the clock never cease, but one day, your hands will cease trying to wring out that old cloth. When you are reaching your end, you will finally stop planning, allotting, controlling and wringing and instead, you will rest into the eternal grace of the present moment. In whose arms you will fall back into at last. And, you will realise: THIS is what it is to be living. At your final time on this planet, you will at last see the falsity we all adhere to and you will come truly home to yourself, with wonder and reverence.
Maybe, just maybe, it is possible to start living this way now. Right now, here and today. Imagine how life might then unfold of its own accord…? No need to imagine. Try it and see.
Angela Dunning, 4th January 2019