How much is your Soul worth?
What cost your self-esteem?
How cheaply will you sell your power?

A safe secure home
The endless roof over your head
At no cost to you?
To pay no rent, can you really relax though?

Your husband, your partner
Your mother, your father
You give them your freedom
When you accept their offer.

At first it seems fine
Things are well, you declare
As you remind yourself repeatedly
“I’m saving a lot!”

With no end in sight
The horizon keeps shifting
As you push it further away
With each sound-bite.

You can holiday and play
Spend online and lunch out
You couldn’t do this, you know,
If you had to pay rent.

Your friends struggle on
Constant mirrors in their plight
Making ends meet
Watching this penny and that.

You feel warm and cosy
Smug in your dream-like state
Sick of their moaning
You tell yourself
“You’re better than that”.

Ad yet…
In the dark, long night
Every once in a while
A niggling voice
Or a fearful dream
Tells you; something’s not quite right…

Your Soul whispers back
Deep down you know
You’re paying a high price
At the cost of being whole.

Your boundaries are loose
And your voice rarely is raised
No anger expressed
Lest your position be changed.

For you’ve sold yourself
For a cosy warm house
And a bank balance with padding
For your trips to the shops
And your stock full of wine.

Your power though has taken a blow
Barely noticeable at times
Your freedom cut short
As you submit instead of grow
Convincing yourself
It will be worth it somehow.

The years they tick by
Now you’re so cosy it’s gone past
The time when you should have left
Is all but a distant path.

Still, every once in a while
That little voice, she crops up
“What price for your Soul?”
“How much for your self-worth?”
“What can I get for my power?”

Your heart she sinks down
As she knows it’s not right
Hard to muster your power though
When you’ve traded it out.

© Angela Dunning, 1 March 2015

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